Haley Scott DeMaria

Archive for May, 2011


My mother-in-law said this tonight about my husband and I. I post this – not to boast or because I think it’s true – but because not many people get this compliment from their in-laws. I am lucky in that way.

But it also led me to think about the background of this comment. My in-laws are in town because both my husband and I were out of town for work this week (lucky for us, we were both in NYC – which I will blog about later- because it was a great trip and a great event!) They also wanted to see their grandsons (and even better to spend time with them when the parents are out of town). So that’s two visitors in our house this weekend.

Downstairs in our basement, one of our midshipmen is also staying here – with his dad, who is visiting from California. Upstairs (in my youngest son’s room – who is now bunked up with his older brother) is a girl “friend” of another midshipman, in town to escort him to the famed “Ring Dance” tomorrow night at the Naval Academy. (Anyone ever try to clean a 7-year-old boy’s room and bathroom to be presentable as a guest room???) As they were heading outside, our midshipman suggested to his friend that she stay until Wednesday to see the Blue Angels fly. “Sure!” I said, “Stay until Wednesday – you HAVE to see the Blue Angels fly!”

“It’s summertime,” I said. “Our house is a revolving door.” To which my mother-in-law commented, “You guys are amazing.” (Although she might have been thinking “crazy.”)

Amazing? Not really. I love it. I love the chaos of Commissioning Week (graduation week here in Annapolis, as all Naval Midshipmen who graduate are technically “commissioned” as officers). I love being a revolving door: a place of solace and relaxation for our Mids. I love being a home-away-from-home for them…and their families and friends. It’s not amazing; it’s an honor and a privilege. Save the accolades for those who really deserve them.

To ALL my (and other) Midshipmen out there, You guys are amazing!

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    It’s a funny thing to be a mom. I remember when my oldest was born, I was shocked they let me take him home. I had no training, had taken no classes, and knew nothing of parenting…or so I thought. And here I was responsible for a life. It was amazing, terrifying and fantastic all at the same time. If you are a mother, then you know what I mean; If you are a mother of young children, then you know that everyday is Mother’s Day. When our children are still living at home, we get daily kisses and hugs because that is how young children show their love and appreciation, and let us know they are thinking of us; we also get to talk to our children – and see our children – each day. So what about Mother’s Day makes it different? If you are lucky, not much. Those of us in the midst of motherhood experience the joys each day (the chaos and stress too, but let’s face it – that’s not going to stop just because it says Mother’s Day on the calendar). So why the holiday?

    Mother’s Day is about celebrating motherhood…not just your mom, or being a mom, but the unmatched love, honor and hardships that come with the job. This weekend I celebrate all of us who are in this together: my sister, whose children behave better than mine; my sister-in-law, who is venturing out into motherhood on her own; my friends, who care for my children when I can not be there; my mother-in-law, who loves me even though I am not Italian; and of course my own mother, who has created and allowed me to be who I am.

    I have not spent Mother’s Day with my mom in a long time, but I hope that she too feels like each day is Mother’s Day. She may not get the daily hugs and kisses from us, but I hope she feels our love and appreciation through the way we live our lives and the legacy of her grandchildren.

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