Day 51: CINCO DE MAYO

Today is Cinco de Mayo. But in our house, today is the senior-night-that-didn’t-happen. As a senior on the Mt. Saint Joseph baseball team, my son and his teammates should have been celebrating their last regular season high school game tonight. My son and some of his best friends, taking the field for the last time in purple and cream. Being in quarantine, away from his teammates and the sport he loves, I’m not even sure he remembers what tonight should have been.

When the baseball schedule was released in January, I looked for this game. I looked for the last home game, knowing it would be his senior night; a night you anticipate for four years (maybe the parents, more than the players). I saw that St. Joe was supposed to play against the team of a childhood friend, a young man with whom my son played t-ball, coach-pitch, and travel baseball. It was perfect: two long-time friends playing against each other, celebrating the end of their baseball careers. It was perfectly scripted.

I am letting myself be a little sad today. Not for myself, but for my senior. This is going to be a hard month of “supposed to be…” missed events. And just like everyone else navigating this craziness, there is no playbook. I don’t know the “right” way to parent through this. Do I mention his missed senior night, and risk reminding him of more loss? Do I not mention it, in hopes he’s not reminded of what he’s missing? I ask myself several of these questions each day, with no right answer.

But I do know, I look forward to celebrating these seniors as soon as we can. Even if they are already freshmen.